Every
Parent wants to be the best to their kids, make them feel special, let
them know they're loved and feel loved. But in a bid to show them
how much we care and love them or try not to hurt their feelings , we may over step
the boundaries as to what is required of us. Our desire to always be
loved by our kids can blindfold us not to see the ways we may be making
them unprepared for the challenges they'll meet later on in life. They
should expect not to always get constant approval from you, their friends or others
especially in areas where what they're demanding for can have
grave consequences or cause harm to them .
Your kids will never stop making demands, it's your duty as a parent to know and tell them where the limt is. This can be made possible by knowing when and how you're to say no to your kids. Saying no to your kids when required does not mean you do not love them, but that you care so much in helping them be a better person despite how hard it is to say no. When and how then do you say 'no' to your kids, even though it'll hurt their feelings at that moment without feeling like a bad parent or have the feeling of guilt linger at the back of your mind?
If you really love your kids, as a parent, one word you shouldn't fail to say and use meaningfully is 'no'. Even though you're financially buoyant, capable of satisfying every need and whim of your kids, there's usually a point or limit to which moderation must be set. Just like you're not expected to give a definite 'no' or 'yes' every-time your child makes a demand, here, you're usually expected to rationalize your child's demands to know if it should be granted or not. Why should you say 'No' to your kids keeping in mind what the child's needs towards his/her development are more important than his/her wants.
You might think its quite easy to utter the word 'no'. But being a parent, it can be hard knowing it's within your capability to fulfill your child's desires but you decide not to.
How to Say No to Your Kids |
Your kids will never stop making demands, it's your duty as a parent to know and tell them where the limt is. This can be made possible by knowing when and how you're to say no to your kids. Saying no to your kids when required does not mean you do not love them, but that you care so much in helping them be a better person despite how hard it is to say no. When and how then do you say 'no' to your kids, even though it'll hurt their feelings at that moment without feeling like a bad parent or have the feeling of guilt linger at the back of your mind?
Image Credit: empoweringparents.com |
Why Should You Say 'No' to Your Kids
If you really love your kids, as a parent, one word you shouldn't fail to say and use meaningfully is 'no'. Even though you're financially buoyant, capable of satisfying every need and whim of your kids, there's usually a point or limit to which moderation must be set. Just like you're not expected to give a definite 'no' or 'yes' every-time your child makes a demand, here, you're usually expected to rationalize your child's demands to know if it should be granted or not. Why should you say 'No' to your kids keeping in mind what the child's needs towards his/her development are more important than his/her wants.
- Saying 'no' to your child when situation demands helps shapes them into better teens and into better adults in future, who can define their goals and objectives and what should be a priority and what shouldn't.
- No one wants a spoilt brat for a child, one that expects they deserve to have everything. If you don't learn to say 'no' to your kids while they're still very young to be controlled, you'll have trouble saying 'no' to them as teenagers or as adults. At these point of their lives, their demands can be ones that are quite dangerous, thereby causing harm to them.
- Finally, learning how to say no to them at an older age(whether teen or adulthood) can make them feel you don't care about them anymore or worse love them anymore. This can generally lead to problems in the home.
When Should You Say 'No' to Your Kids
- When their demand can cause harm to them
- As a way to teach them moderation and choosing of priorities.
- Everyone needs to learn how to be contented. Your kids need to learn this at an early age in life.
How to to Say 'No' to Your Kids
You might think its quite easy to utter the word 'no'. But being a parent, it can be hard knowing it's within your capability to fulfill your child's desires but you decide not to.
- Let them know the reason why you've said no. You can't just say 'no' because you've been saying too many 'yes'. Tell them the genuine reason why you've disapproved their request and even if they disagree, you're still the one taking the final decision.
- Be stern when you say it, don't sound unsure in your decision. It does no good when you say 'no' and keep changing your mind about it. They might pout or cry or throw a fit, but draw their attention to what they love doing.
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